Once upon a time there was a sparrow named Sparrow. Sparrow lived in the city of Las Vegas. He (let’s pretend it is a boy sparrow) had become familiar with the ways of man. “Where’s a good place for breakfast?” the Sparrow wondered. Now by careful observation, he realized that humans, especially young humans, often drop bits of food. So he decided to look for his breakfast at the outdoor play area of McDonalds.
“What do I spy?” exclaimed Sparrow bobbing and looking carefully at the ground, first with one eye and then the other. “It looks like a french fry!” Over he hopped and picked up the fry carefully in his beak. But it was too big. By careful manipulation he managed to grab the end of the fry and shake it back and forth until a tiny bit broke off. “It’s a little cold but still good,” he chirped as he shook and ate his fry.
“Oh, no! Who is this but my mean friend, Other Sparrow, who has come to take my fry away. I must run and hop and flutter holding on to my fry and try to get away from Other Sparrow.”
So off around and around the playground they hopped, Other Sparrow in hot pursuit. Finally, since Other Sparrow was somewhat bigger, Sparrow gave up and dropped the fry.
The moral of this story could be 1) that I am easily amused; 2) that sometimes birds are more interesting than people first thing in the morning; or 3) that if this bird had lived in the Galapagos Islands and there were a McDonalds there, it would have evolved so that it had the kind of beak that could eat a french fry fast enough to keep it away from other birds and this type of bird would ultimately have been called the McDonalds sparrow.